11 Things I Would Tell My 20 Year Old Self

By Lilian Wamaitha
I was having a conversation with my best friend the other day about life. Being that we have been best friends since high school, our lives have always been pretty much the same.
She asked me what advice I would give my twenty-year-old self if I had the time and that got me thinking.
Truthfully, if you had to change something in your life today, what would it be?
For most of us, it would probably be things we have done in our past. If we had to, we would go back and change events in our past that have led us to where we are or that are the reason we have not achieved everything we wanted to by now.
But that is the past and that’s where it should remain.
Nevertheless, here are a few things that I would tell my twenty-year-old self mostly about life.
1. Quit worrying so much
I know that one of your natural instincts is to worry about everything especially when things don’t seem to work the way you want.
In as much as you worry about all these things, most of the time, the works case scenario never even happens.
But one thing I know is that no matter how much time you spend worrying about stuff, the outcome is always still the same.
Never forget that nobody’s life is perfect and yours won’t be either. No matter what, these bad experiences only serve to make you stronger.
It is through them that we learn to grow.
2. Accept that life is not rigid and change is inevitable.
Don’t be so rigid about your plans. A majority of the time, life will not go according to your plans.
Possibly some of your friends will get married and start having kids before you can figure out what you want. That former classmate of yours will start pursuing their post graduate before you have figured out what career path you want to take.
All your friends will figure out what they want to do with their lives. Probably some of them have already turned their passions into lucrative businesses. Some of them are already getting promotions at work and better jobs.
Whatever the case, understand that your life will fluctuate once in a while. Don’t be scared of this change.
Don’t be scared and hate yourself if everybody around you seem to be doing better than you. You are on your own timeline and what matter is what you want to do with your life.
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3. Things will always turn out better than you imagined
Believe me you will become someone significant in the society. You will write books, you will create art, you will own that business.
Of course it’s hard to believe that now but trust me it will happen. Things are bound to get so much better for you. Just have the patience and keep being the person you are.
4. Please stop buying things you don’t want or need
Just because it looks good now doesn’t mean that you need it. Just because you have an extra 500 shillings doesn’t mean you get to spend it on stuff you don’t need.
By the time you are 30, think about all the things your will have accumulated that you don’t even use.
Instead, learn to save and invest in things that matter. That is what life is all about. Not fancy dresses and a glamorous life.
5. Spend money on experience not things
Things have a limited shelf life. Experiences on the other hand live with you forever. It’s one of the things in life that you won’t figure out until you have wasted money on things.
Go on road trips. Have dinner with friends and family. Attend that networking event you have been meaning to. These are the kind of things that leave you with memories but having excess baggage will never lead to a life of meaning.
6. Don’t be afraid to end relationships that you don’t need
You are in your twenties and settling is not something you should be doing.
So, don’t over stay in relationships that you never wanted to in life. Cultivate relationships that bring meaning to your life instead.
Cut ties with those ‘friends’ who seem to only care about  today and not the future.
7. Talk less and listen more
There are so many things that you still have to learn in life.
Talking less and listening more will serve as a foundation of your career and what you want to do in life.
Don’t be in a hurry to show how much you know. Instead take every opportunity and people who come into your life as lessons to learn. Learn as much as you can from them because it is only in doing so that you become a better person.
8. Invest in yourself
In your twenties, it easy to think that you know it all and are invisible.
Trust me when I tell you, you don’t and are not.
Your life is just starting and you won’t believe how much things are going to change in the coming years.
Spend your twenties learning and investing in yourself.
Read a book, watch a movie, sign up for classes. Whatever works for you, you need it because it is what shapes your future.
9. Master your money
I know it’s really easy to not care too much about money, well, mostly because you don’t have much but believe me, this is the time to care.
How you use your money today, dictates your financial future.
Read here on 4 money habits you need in your 20s to live a better life in 10 years.
10. Don’t take a job for the money but responsibilities
This is one of the best career advices you will ever get.
Look around you. How many people will tell you that they are happy doing what they do? A majority of them will tell you that they took that job because of the money.
While money is important, taking a job based on that will not amount to anything.
Your twenties are when you start shaping your career and you can only do that with the right job.
11. Finally, don’t be afraid to fail
Life is full of ups and downs that most of the time you will not be able to explain.
Succeeding however has a lot to do with being open to making mistakes.
They say that doing something and failing at it is a hundred times better than not doing something at all.
So take risks. If you fail learn from them. Don’t hold yourself back afraid that you will mess up.
Every success story has an element of failure.
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Live in the moment but treasure more the lessons you learn along the way. Your twenties will feel like a rollercoaster ride, but a decade from now, it is the choices you make today that will define you for the rest of your life.
Lilian is a Communication Officer at Career Point Kenya. What would you tell your 20-year-old self? Share your opinion below.